When the moment is staring you right in the face...that you cant even grab it.. how do you trust that what you see is gonna be yours? That your gonna be blessed with, something so incredible? That your gonna have something that won't leave you, that won't give up on you, that you become someone's whole world and nobody else in the world is more important to them than YOU! How overwhelming is it when you know someone wants to have you hold their hand when they're scared, they want you to be the one who kisses the booboo. That they want you to be the first one who hears alllll about their first thing. That you will be the one from the very beginning to the very end...that you will be the only person who makes the hard days, better just simply because of YOUR wisdom..that you will be the one person who they depend on and nobody in the world could EVER come close....that is what a mom is all about. That is what it's like to become a mom. When eyes speak to you that have longed to meet you.. that a little voice can melt your whole world because it salitifies who YOU are..that you aren't just another person to them! In each of these moments, you will be grateful you went to every doctor appointment, you will feel like you gained somethin from every moment you felt you wasted someone's time. It will all become CLEAR to you, just as the rain comes in to clear the darkest clouds..you will then know that every thing was worth it, she wasn't the cause of why all this had to happen, she just wanted her mommy to be okay.. she just wanted her mommy to know it's gonna be okay..she just wanted every kick to remind you that it's all gonna be worth it... You will be grateful that someone could trust you so much with such a tiny thing..it will not matter to you what you lost and what walked out...it will not matter every moment that made you feel like lonely. It will not matter to you every person who hurt you... all that will be important to you is that you see a smile on that precious face. That you will meet someone's needs by a kiss, holding them, feeding them or even changing the setting of a room alll by an attitude. Every moment that you have ever felt like you just can't do it anymore...every moment that you felt it wasn't gonna end...every moment you cried cause you were so scared. Every moment you held your breath to speak up...every moment that didn't ever feel it could end... every moment you felt utterly vulnerable, naked, out of control...every time you didn't understand why.. every single time it felt like it couldn't get any worse then what is going on...I promise you that first cry. That first time she will be placed in YOUR arms after hours of contractions, pushing and change...nothing else in the world will ever matter. Nothing else will ever measure that feeling...that feeling to know you had created LIFE! you truly do matter that much to someone and your existence is more then enough. More then just another fill in the blank. Far more then a mistake could ever be. Far more then just another person. You will exist. You will matter. You will feel alive, the reason to be alive to make someone want to face everything day in and day out, you will feel like YOU matter, you will feel ur ability to teach makes a difference in who they will become and who they're gonna be...you will feel important cause let's be honest nothing in the world has a better then feeling depended and trusted with an outcome ..this is why becoming a mom is the greatest blessing in the whole world. :)
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