In what form are your blessings coming in?

You know it can be quite overwhelming when you can't reach something you know will benefit you in some way or another...I have also learned how frustrating it can be when you just want to know how the health of your child is.. you wanna see how big she is and how she is forming..and no matter what anyone says,  it doesn't take away any fear that could possibly run thru your mind. I have found at the end of every moment to consider that she is alive, that she is growing by her kicks daily and it's up to me to keep her as strong and healthy as possible. I can only keep as positive as I possibly can...there have been so many times that I have wanted to just say screw it all..why bother even look at the positive. But you know the best blessings that come out of being positive...it not only makes you personally feel better..but it draws attention to what's going right and you find in those moments who really cares to know what's going on or better yet who is noticing what is going on. It can be as simple as asking how I am..to touching my belly and letting me know that you notice this little squirm worm growing.  You know as much as I could tell you how hard it has been doing this on my own and learning to accept a new plan for my life then I ever had planned..I have had service be given to me, I have met people I never knew existed, I have had conversations with people that have taught me I had motherhood cut out for me..that I would be a natural..and you know I tell you that is probably one of thee hardest things to believe in when your brand new at something. When you don't know what could possibly even be normal. Well in and all of this being said something I can't deny is how involved God is and how excited I am that him and I get to regain a relationship that we once had in heaven and get to see it come alive again.. I get to learn how to trust in God when everything in me wants to feel like it isn't possible...he helps me regain trust..to believe in things that i can't see. If there is anything I've learn to grow out of this whole thing is just cause ppl don't ask doesn't mean they don't care, that everything I feel to tell people is a prompting to bless someone's life and if I am angry the only person that suffers is myself... so let's be honest live a life up to all hour expectations,  dream because you can, and have hope because it only comes when you don't let fear overrule your life.